Friday, December 26, 2014

a year later...

As I sat down to post to the blog this morning, a dear friend shared the following with me.

"When things don't go as you would like, accept the situation immediately. If you indulge in feelings of regret, they can easily spill over the line into resentment. Remember that I am sovereign over your circumstances, and humble yourself under My mighty hand. Rejoice in what I am doing in your life, even though it is beyond your understanding . I am the Way, the Truth and the Life. In me you have everything you need, both for this life and for the life yet to come. Don't let the impact of the world shatter your thinking or draw you away from focusing on Me. The ultimate challenge is to keep fixing your eyes on Me, no matter what is going on around you. When I am central in your thinking, you are able to view circumstances from My perspective.(1 Peter 5:6)"

Little did she know it ties so well in with what God was showing me this morning. You see today I could be angry and focused on what I do not have or rather what I am missing. To be honest all year I have lived with a regretting heart, and a little angry that the last moments shared with my dear friend, Lillian, were moments I was in the deepest cloud of grief over losing my son. Frankly it is frustrating to not remembering a lot about that time in my life. Grieving two of the most beloved people in my life at the same time was definitely NOT my plan.So today like every other day I have a choice. I can choose to focus on what did not go my way, or choose to focus my heart on the one who is The Way.
"The decision must be deep in our (my) heart- not our physical heart but our inner self as a whole. Our thoughts, emotions, intellect and spirit all combine to form this beautiful spiritual heart within us. To make the decision to experience God, you must have a heart that is open to Him. When we forget to be renewed day by day by looking, and listening for God, we loose our eternal perspective, get entangled in the troubles of today, and close our heart to Him. A closed heart, tragically forgets God."*

Though many times I completely fall short I have chosen to refuse to close my heart to God. He has proven Himself faithful. I will choose to remember His goodness when things go 'my way' and His goodness when they don't. I will have joy, believing in Him. He is too real to deny. I made the decision over a year ago to choose joy, not because it sounded like a good blog title, or because it made me sound like a good Christ follower. I decided to follow. To follow wherever this journey took us. To have an open heart to the changes that would take place. Why? Because I know God has my best in mind. I choose to believe that. Past all reasoning, all proving based  data and research, all the black and white. I chose to trust the heart of my heavenly Father.

"For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans to prosper you, not to harm you; plans to give you hope and a future"

Today I choose joy.


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